I walk by, moving to the other side of the sidewalk. My
heart is tearing inside but I don’t know what to do. We are crossing a bridge over a river that borders Thailand and Berma (now Miramar).
We have been told not to give money and given the reasons. They all make
sense in my mind but there is a conflict going on between my mind and my heart.
I hold back, zoom in from afar, and snap this photo as my husband walks by, his
heart breaking and his eyes welling up. He has a huge heart and can hardly bare
not to give. The children break him down and he quietly slips them a coin when
he thinks no one is looking. But I see. For, there is tension in my heart as
well. My mind is strong and I follow at a distance, my eyes drinking in the
scenes that my camera cannot capture.
So, I hold my head up and walk by her as well, refusing to
catch her eye. I cannot even speak her language to tell her I am sorry, to tell
her……what could I tell her?
Last week, as I pulled in to the parking lot of Big Lots, I
saw two homeless people on the street corner with two dogs in their shopping
carts. I went out of my way to approach them.
We talked about dogs. They love
their dogs and I love mine. We found something in common. We laughed about the cute things they do and
spoke of how much joy they bring our lives. They weren’t ‘homeless people’;
they were just fellow dog lovers.
As I walked away, I thought, “Really, you talked about
dogs?” When I came out of Big Lots,
with dog food in my bag, they were gone.
There was no opportunity to speak of more than our canine friends.
Yet, I tell myself, I didn’t just walk by them. I didn’t
avoid their eyes.
What a wonderful story. Sometimes it is enough just to be recognized, and talked to as an equal. I think being not noticed can be worse than even being disliked.
ReplyDeleteI would have looked away years ago too. And then God led me to start a blanket ministry in the homeless community. He opened my eyes to see them as He sees them and what a blessing that awaited me! I now am writing a book sharing their stories and my journey into this new world.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you did not avoid their eyes:) They are loved by Him as He loves us!
Oh, but you planted seed in that parking lot. Seed that translates God's love!
ReplyDeleteWhen we visited Thailand we were told that someone brings people over from Cambodia and that person takes almost all the money given to the beggars, so not to give. The man who told us this said that he was American,and have lived there for a long time. He told us if we wanted to do something then to buy them a meal and drink and take it to them. Usually it was a woman and a child..
ReplyDeleteIt is so sad, but its good to give the food they can eat right then, after all, they sit in the same place for hours and would be hungry. xx
im hosting a bloghop on tuesday's your welcome feel free to share and blessed others with your devotional craft and old memory cooking recipe..anything you want others to read....thanks if you do...loves soraya
ReplyDeleteMy heart struggles so for my mind and eyes are all connected to that heart, that heartfelt love and care for other human beings. I struggle with to whom and when can I?, should I?, will I? give or not give. God knows each of these precious people for He created them and knows their very needs. Should I be one to give, He will direct me. I must just let go of my questions and doubts and whys and whens. Just be His.
ReplyDeleteCaring through Christ, ~ linda
This is something I think about a lot too, something that tears at my heart and my conscience. It has come to the point where if I am in a place where I can give and feel that I am being directed to give, I will. Otherwise, I do my best to not seem like I am blatantly ignoring them. It's hard, I know. I always wonder- how did they get into this situation? Was it their "fault"? Is this a choice or a consequence? I talk to them when I can too and sometimes I find out their situation. I wish I had more time to dedicate to this, but in a society where everything is moving so fast, I just do what I can and trust my heart.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing.
I am just like you, if i saw someone begging, my hearts melts. Anyway, Thanks God that he gives us the opportunity to help and that we are not the one begging. Touching post.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your heart breaking story on "Tell me a True Story." The American man suggesting to give food sounds like a good way to help. When I landed in Peru there were children with hands out. I had some of the snacks from the plane trip, and opened the window of the car we were riding in and pushed them out the window. Suddenly the car was swarmed with more children. Our host exclaimed, please Hazel don't give them anything. Of course it was too late, but I did show the children empty hands and shook my head nada.
ReplyDeleteWhen we are in Budapest, we always struggle with this problem. Everyday people approach us on the streets, asking for money--gypsies who make a good living begging, maimed and crippled people with disabilities we never see in the U.S., men who live on the streets so they can drink all night and sleep most of the day, old people who need money for a prescription, etc. We ask God to prompt us when He wants us to give and we walk past the others, sometimes easily and sometimes as you walked past these children. We leave any edible trash on the top of the trash cans because we know someone will be going through the trash to find something to eat and we occasionally offer to buy food for someone begging, but they typically refuse. Old people sell wilted flowers to supplement their tiny pensions, but you can't buy from them all...it's hard. We've found there are no easy answers except to pray for discernment.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your heart. We give food to homeless people here in the US to help them, as we have been told not to give them cash in case they have a drug or alcohol addiction. It warms my heart to think of a homeless person having a dog to give them companionship, because our know my dog brings a great deal of joy to our lives.
ReplyDeleteBreaks my heart to see this....it is somehow the same scenario in some parts in my hometown. :'(
ReplyDeleteI have worked with the homeless and poor in Brooksville fla. for a number of years now. We have a sunday dinner that is open to all and we've fed tens of thousands, given them food and clothes and prayed for anyone who needed prayer. Since most people will see homeless not nearly as much as we do I would suggest a quick prayer for wisdom before you approach or speak. Let the Holy Spirit influence and guide you. There are some homeless that can be helped such as those who are homeless because of their economic failure. Others have drug, alcohol, mental and legal problems and cannot be helped by us. These have to reach out and accept Jesus to have their lives changed. You did the right thing when talking to the dog owners. Talk to them like people not like homeless people. Unfortunately if you intend to go into a store and buy something dont try to pleasantly surprise them tell them to pls wait here i want to get you something for your dogs. There are as many stories as there are homeless. Some of the worst people to approach the homeless happen to be christians. nobody can be as mean and judgmental as some christians. if you are one of them do the homeless and yourself a favor and avoid them. They dont need you telling them whats really wrong with them and giving them a piece of your mind. You Pharisees! You dont have to understand them, but you do have to love them.
ReplyDeleteI never turn my face away, and if I don't give, I respectfully ignore the request.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful post. I can only imagine how hard it must have been for you to have to walk past these people and not help. I think it was great that you stopped to talk to the homeless at Big Lots. Just the fact that you treated them as equals and not as some disease probably made all the difference in the world to them. May we continue to see others as God sees them and extend his love to all.
ReplyDeleteGod bless!
Thanks for your honesty here...I am growing here as well...don’t we all just want to be seen...I want to really look at each person I come across...not what they are wearing...where they live...just each person...created in God’s imagine...nature is beautiful...but still it’s in every persons eyes we see His creation. I will go out today more aware...thanks~
ReplyDeleteYou treated them like regular people -- I am sure this soothed their hearts more than you know.
ReplyDeleteI just loved it that you talked to them about their dogs. how real and personable. I think you made God smile that day.
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing this story.....people are people no matter their walk in life and its so heart warming and incouraging to know that you treated them just as you would a friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI was homeless for a while, staying at a women's shelter with my then 1 1/2 yr old son after leaving a very abusive situation. In Missouri. Homeless isn't something just found in Asian countires, African countries, etc--it's right here in our own back yards. Folks who knew we were temporarily homeless treated us kindly, and I never asked for a hand out. I wanted a hand UP, and proved it by working hard to get back on my feet with a job and home for us.
Seeing children and their parents sift through the dump for things to sell and food to eat, and orphaned children sleeping on cardboard on the sidewalks in Guatemala City broke my heart into a million pieces. I cried my eyes out for a long, long time. It really made me think just how fortunate we are to have family assistance programs in place here in the USA. They don't have the basics to survive, no home, no food, and no medical care. There is no medicaid, food stamps, nor welfare of any sort in their country.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this through your loving and compassionate heart. You are a blessing!
ReplyDeleteLove in Him,
Laurie
What a precious story. My husband is unemployed and the waiting on the Lord is...well, some days kinda difficult. But...our situation is nothing compared to others and I often need the reminder!
ReplyDeleteWOW Shanda, you had me at "I walked by". Such compassion. I have been blessed by you today. Thank you for sharing your story and your heart. Thank you also for hosting this linky. I'm gonna tweet this one.
ReplyDeleteThat making eye contact, and talking face to face at eye level is it. Loving, treating as equals. Money doesn't even need to change hands. Sitting beside them, learning their names... I agree.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Shanda.
Jennifer Dougan
www.jenniferdougan.com
I am from the Philippines, another Asian and developing country like Thailand. I don't seem to understand why there are rules not to give alms to homeless people. Here in the Philippines, people give at their own free will. It breaks my heart to see people like them every single day. Seeing them reminds me so much of how God has truly blessed me with a comfortable home.
ReplyDeleteTalking to the "dog owners" is such a kind gesture from you, Shanda. I'm pretty sure you were able to brighten their day more than you ever thought you did. God bless! :-)
I'm often not sure what to do or say to homeless and even find myself wondering if they really are homeless. Where we live now. we've been approached so many times by people who have similar stories of why they need money right now for a hotel to stay in until they can get into a homeless shelter. We've given people money at times.
ReplyDeleteWe keep snack sized packs of crackers in our car to give to people who are begging on the streets. They are frequently at street corners where there is a light and people have to stop. I ask them if they want some crackers. Usually they say yes. I figure, if they really are in need, that will at least help them to get to the next meal and not starve. If they aren't really in need I didn't just give away money to a "scammer". It's really, really hard to know what to do.
Shanda - I had an experience a few weeks ago at the hospital where I work. A lady got on the elevator at the same time. She told me her daughter was an inpatient and was "doing much better". She said, "God is good." I smiled and said yes and then got off on my floor. Later I wondered why I didn't say more. Although I believe this woman was a Christian, I feel that I missed an opportunity to show how much I love Christ.
ReplyDeleteThat would be so difficult. What were their reasons for not giving? Sometimes I don't give money, but I offer food. Bless your sweet heart :)
ReplyDeleteSuch blessing for both you and them as you shared dog stories!
ReplyDeleteFor the people begging on street corners, I quickly roll my window down and hand them gallon size zip-loc bags stuffed with a pair of socks, a juice, crackers, toothbrush & toothpaste, and a "Daily Bread" devotional. The devotionals are out of date ones which I obtain from our church.
So much joy to help in a small way.
I think that was perfect. You recognized them as human beings and talked with them about a common interest.
ReplyDeleteThanks for a very heartfelt post. I struggle alot when I see homeless people on our streets. My heart goes out to them and when I can I try to help. We hear all the time that they are taking advantage of us and don't really need the help. After being on an Inner City Mission I don't believe this is always true. Even if they were I believe in the following scripture from our Book of Mormon; Mosiah 4:16 "And also, ye yourseves will succor those that stand in need of yur succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to persish."
ReplyDeleteI went through a similar situation in Varanasi, India. I couldn't help giving something to a beggar who looked like he had leprosy. But then, I was swarmed by others. It's so difficult to know what to do.
ReplyDeleteThis is the third time this week that the Lord has brought this topic to my attention in the form of a blog (I rarely have time to read many on any given week!) I feel as if he is preparing me for an opportunity to reach out.
ReplyDeleteLatisha
Shanda, I don't think there are words we can say to the homeless that will make them feel better. But the attention you gave spoke louder than words. And maybe for now, that was enough.
ReplyDeletethe interesting thing is i talked to 2 homeless guys with dogs at walmart as well...crazy huh? then the police rolled them...i love hanging out with the homeless actually...you got to be safe about it but they def have some stories...
ReplyDeleteLooking in their eyes...yes. That is a huge gift. I wonder how many eyes they see shift away, and so few look directly at them.
ReplyDeleteA touching story ... God bless you for taking time to talk. That is a gift.
ReplyDeletei love that you and your husband have such compassionate hearts. how i wish for more to purchase dog food for the "dog lovers".... bless you dear friend.
ReplyDeleteGreat story.
ReplyDeleteI don't run into too many homeless, as I live in a rural community. On occasion though I do see a man on the corner. I don't look away, but usually stop and offer $10. Yes, I hand them cash. Since I don't see many to help, I don't keep "things" to give them. I know many struggle that the person will go and buy alcohol or drugs. Maybe so. . . or not. I have, through a prior job, seen individuals who did not have their fix of the moment. It looked very painful. And let's face it, there aren't enough good treatment programs for everyone. I hope they will go grab some food with my donation. And I always look them in the eye and wish them a good day. Most are older than I and I address them as sir.
ReplyDeleteI always figure that its only a few dollars to me that may ease another's suffering. I can't bring myself to judge their intentions. Seems kinda risky that the Lord might be popping up to test me in some way. There's that verse I believe in Matthew about "when I was hungry you gave me food. . . " sticks in my mind.
One day though, just to see. . . A fairly young man was on the corner. I offered my usual $10, but happened to have a candy bar in the car with me. (I CERTAINLY don't need it!!) I wrapped the money around the candy and gave it to him with my well wishes. As I drove away I looked back back in the mirror. The young man had unwrapped the candy and was stuffing it in his mouth. Made me smile that I had made the right call.
:)
ReplyDelete