Once I went through culture shock. We had just moved to Changuinola, Panama: a town built around banana farm and isolated at the northeast corner of Panama. Our sole means of leaving were on the company plane that only seated seven people.
Life was different: I had only one friend that spoke English and she and I had little in common. Few others made an effort to get acquainted with me. I was lonely.
Everything frustrated me: the fact that I could not leave when I desired, the politics, the school, the crop dusters that sprayed pesticide on me as I ran and the lack of fresh food. We were the last stop for the food container and milk was often sour by the time it reached our little town.
I had met a missionary family in passing a few days earlier and needed someone to vent my emotions on. I didn’t have their phone number but knew they lived south on the only road going through town. So, I got on my bike and headed their direction. All I had to do to find them was to ask for the Gringos!
Upon arriving at their house, we began getting to know each other and I shared my frustrations. The man looked at me and said, “Shanda, you have culture shock!”
The clouds began to open immediately and rays of sunshine fell around me. Now that I knew what was wrong, I could work with it!
It wasn’t long before my life was brighter.
That leads to what is on my heart today. I have been feeling things totally new to me and it has been bringing me down. What is the meaning of my life? What does God want from me now my kids are moving on? Have I really accomplished anything so far? Is there a place for me to serve here in the States? Am I too old to be of use? Have I passed my prime and no one will hire me?
Then the clouds opened again and rays of sunshine fell around me.
I’m going through mid-life crisis.
I thought that was for men only but it is not. Now that I know what is wrong, I can work through it. It won’t be long before my life will be brighter. I'm sure you will hear more if this in future posts!
Shanda, God has always found wonderful ways for you to be of service to him, and I know he will continue to, there is no doubt. He will call on all who call on him!!!
ReplyDeleteShanda, If it is any consolation, I am hearing this echo among women in this season of life. In coaching we call it a life transition. Take heart, even though it feels uncomfortable, hope and new life are on the other side. Praying for you friend!
ReplyDeleteHi Shanda, I so understand the culture shock analogy, I have been there, when I went from a rural place into a city for a few years. I struggled with it hugely for a number of reasons, it felt completely alien to me. Everything I had within me was blessed to me by God as I leaned on Him. I'm so grateful for His help.
ReplyDeleteMay you know God's touch and leading, and be encouraged in your walk with Him today.
Thank you for your post Shanda, you are in my prayers.
It's awesome to hear that you have recognized this and embraced it. I think too often people don't want to face what's really wrong and things spiral out of control. I'm in no position to give advice, but I can say that when I reach this point in my life I hope I am as strong as you seem to be about it :)
ReplyDeleteI hope the rays of sunshine continue to fall around you. Thank you for sharing your heart with us.
ReplyDeleteDear Shanda, You writing and ministry are always such an inspiration to me, and I know to many others. Don't let Satan discourage you. Keep your focus on His rays of Son-shine, and remember that we all have culture shock because we're just strangers here, longing for home with Him.
ReplyDeleteLove in Him,
Laurie Collett, Saved by Grace
http://savedbygracebiblestudy.blogspot.com/
I love the way you took us through your vulnerable spot to your sunshine spot. It's lovely there, yes?
ReplyDeleteOh, yes - to know what the challenge is really about! Growing up children changing the rules, too! Culture shock is uncomfortable, kind of hurts, provokes tears - makes you feel on the outside looking in - but I am assured the story ends well - even if I get stuck on a crying moment:)
ReplyDeleteAs always beautiful photos. Yes, I like.
ReplyDeleteI went through this after I retired early. I'm finding my way with God's help and I know you will too :-) Blessings. xx
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember my culture shock...still adjusting.
ReplyDeleteDear Shanda, I went through a midlife crisis triggered by my thyroid problem. It was terrible! I had always been a grateful contented person then suddenly it seemed as if all the decisions in my life were a mistake! I would cry at the least bit thing. I held on to the Word of God, especially Philippians 6. What I can tell you is it's just a phase, and it's like a passageway to bigger better things! Patsy from
ReplyDeleteHeARTworks
I'm glad you were able to put your finger on what was bothering you. It's true, naming a problem helps us face it more clearly. Best of luck to you in wading through this next phase.
ReplyDeleteI'm just stopping by from Just Write.
Being able to "give it a name" is comforting. Once it has a name, we know how to grapple with it and make sense of it. Transitions are always so hard. Praying for you.
ReplyDeleteIs that what you call it, Culture Shock! I had it when I went to live in America.. everything was different to the casual Australian way of life. People didn't laugh as much as us, the food was different and no one walked... Anyhow, it took time, and then I had many friends who I now miss since I am back here again. xx
ReplyDeleteOh Girl I am here with you!! My last left the nest a year ago and with several other life changes happening I found myself so discouraged! Two weeks ago or more I realized why! :) it does help knowing and yet still difficult for there are still so many unanswered questions.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing! I too have began blogging about the effects of my nest being empty! It's nice to know others are on the journey with you!
I will be 50 in a year or two. Yikes! Not that long ago, I had an experience while considering the story of Jesus turning water into wine. When did this miracle happen? At the end of the wedding, Jesus turned ordinary wine into the best wine that was served that day. We can have our most fruitful times later in life! I believe it. It is happening in my life.
ReplyDeleteThanks Shanda...I like learning new things about you. May you continue to feel His rays of Sonshine surrounding you with love and the uplifting of your heart!
ReplyDeleteWhy don't we ever get used to God moving us from one life place to another? Intellectually, we know it's coming, and we don't really want things to stay the same forever, but, gee, does our vision have to stay so short?
ReplyDeleteWe are pretty much in the same place I think and I agree - anyone can have a midlife crisis, especially empty nesters :) Thank the Lord he is with us each step of the way!
ReplyDeleteHi! I put up #42 frugal Living
ReplyDeleteI'm hosting a weekly linky which is all about seasonal celebration and would love it if you popped over and linked this post! It would be great to introduce your blog to my subscribers! Seasonal Celebration Linky http://naturalmothersnetwork.com/seasonal-celebration-sunday/seasonal-celebration/ Really hope to see you there! Rebecca x
Oh, I am so un-travelled. God has kept me in the same state my whole life teaching me how to learn to rejoice in the place He has me. I am sharing a poem today, Shanda. I hope you will be blessed by it.
ReplyDeleteLove it. Beautiful words. I'm linking up. I so hope you'll come link up again at Stop for the One. Blessings friend.
ReplyDeleteGod is preparing you ... keep the faith!!
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for the hop.
Shanda, I know how you feel on both counts. I have experienced culture shock several times and also the feeling of "What now?" as my last child left home! As you lean on the Lord, He will lead you through into a new season of life.
ReplyDeleteAll of us go through the feelings you are experiencing. I think it's a good thing to wonder if we chose the good path, if we've been running the good race or if we're lost. Lost for a minute, maybe, until we look back to our Lord to lead us where He may. It's not easy when we don't have a road map, but it's the way He works. Thank God, you are seeking and asking. He has the answers for you and I believe you will be comforted in due season. Blessings, Nona
ReplyDeleteShanda, I remember that feeling. You know it DOES help to know "what" the matter is-at least for me. I'm caught right now working and caring for my ailing parents. HA, I used the word caught. That says volumes right there, huh? Blessings***
ReplyDeleteWe needed extra income, so at age 60 I began a new career. It required me to take a health class and learn medical terms, but hospitals have 200 jobs that are not doctor or nurse. I became a Physical Therapy aide. My background was bookkeeping, so after 2 years when the job at the hospital ended I went to work at the County inputting child support payments into the computer and later promoted. That job lasted 10 years. During that time, I ministered, silently at first. My inspirational calendar on my desk was read by many who passed by. Then one by one there was personal ministry, not loud and long but just enough.
ReplyDeleteIf God wants you to go to work, HE will provide and you are NEVER too old. If he has something else for you - He will let you know!
It is amazing how blessed we are in the US. However, I am serving an Inner City Mission and what you discribed is kind of a little like what we are running into. I am working with a family right now that is living with their two children ages 13 1nd 14 in a 19 foot camp trailer. They are close to the difination of being homeless. Anyway,I can assure you there is much work to be done right here in the US. I am 66 years old and I assume you are much younger; enjoy your mid-life crisis; because it happens to us all and sometimes more than once. Blessings to you for all you have been doing; I think you are amazing.
ReplyDeleteI gain a level of much appreciated comfort that was not there before when I to gain the knowledge of 'What it is' giving a name to that 'problem' I seem to be stuck in.
ReplyDeleteWhat a gift it was to find that 'gringo' friend!!!
Blessings to you, dear one as you work on through these tougher spots in the journey:o)
Love this ... funnily enough the Old City Panama is one of my children's fav places they have ever had the pleasure of visiting. We have all that life has to offer, sadly, we have to be presented with reasons to appreciate it all sometimes!
ReplyDeleteOh..how this phase of life catches us off guard...I have often said..we talk young moms encourage them through the transitions of young motherhood...but no one prepared me for the huge changes...marriage...grandbabies...leaving and cleaving...and than(not quite fully for me yet)...life is wide open...in a way...we get to rethink everything...ask questions to God that we could not ask when raising a family...it is a bit of an adjustment...but can be very exciting as well...
ReplyDeleteBlessings as you through these transitional times...
Thank you very much for placing this blog hop on Natural Mothers Network's linky: Seasonal Celebration! You helped make Seasonal Celebration a wealth of intelligent, creative and resourceful information and it's been such a pleasure for me and many others to read through each post. I am really looking forward to seeing you again Sunday evening or Monday! Rebecca x
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